Sunday morning began early with a run with Tina. It was so nice to see her again. We started at the cop-shop and ran/walked for about 3.55 miles assuming my calibration on the iPod is correct and 4.00 miles, assuming it isn't. For the sake of my sore muscles, I'll claim it isn't.

I had forgotten how much more difficult and straining it is to run outdoors on actual pavement versus running inside a controlled environment on a treadmill. Holy cow my shins are killing me! I wouldn't say I've got full-out shin splints, but my legs hurt in places they haven't felt anything in ages. I definitely will be adjusting the treadmill to a 1% incline to mimic the effort required for outdoor running. Otherwise, all these weekday miles won't amount to anything when it comes to conditioning myself for the big run in January.

I'll post more later, but although Sunday was a nice slap of the reality of the difficulties I can anticipate during this journey on which I've embarked, it was also a nice change from the slothlike existence I've led while trying to fix problems that weren't mine to own. Maybe I'll try to focus on the things I can control, like stepping onto that treadmill/track/trail 5 days a week and having the mindset to approach it as a means of finding joy, rather than something that's necessary to lose that next pound. Forget maybe, that sounds like a plan to me. And it's a nice perk that the pounds are falling off all on their own. It's a shame Joel likes big girls. It's a shame I accepted being one because I thought that would make a difference. But it's absolutely brilliant and fabulous that I'm getting my self-image re-established and my body back after those years of letting both just waste away.

Life is still good. It's just different.

I'm running again, and I'm loving it. Of course the Nike+ thing is having issues and not showing all the running I've done recently, but I imagine it will synch up eventually. At any rate, I'm running. I'm running because 1) I love it and 2) it's cheaper than therapy and 3) I've signed up to run in the Chevron Houston Marathon in January 2009. I've run the Half-Marathon once previously, but this will be an entirely new experience for me. More or less, this is in honor of my turning 40 this year. I wanted to do something exciting, yet something that didn't wreak more havoc on my already crazy life. Running is good for you, right? So that's what I'm doing.

I'm running again. A lot. And I love it.

February is here already. So is my new ring! (historically, over the short course of our marriage, I have gotten new jewelry in February; what's not to like about that??)

I so enjoy this month in case you couldn't tell. The kids are excited about Valentines' Day. Hunter and I finished preparing her project for school this weekend (a special box to store the valentines' stuff) and Nicholas has picked out an adorable Ratatouille card to give to Cindy, along with some yummy chocolates. J and I have a wonderfully romantic evening planned, while the kids are going to be enjoying a carnival at the Club. What a fabulous investment that's turned out to be! Not only is the gym well-equipped, I've still not found much of anything that's better than the wet sauna these days. It's great for the skin, not to mention the waistline.

We had a great weekend, filled with too much shopping as per the norm when J is home. We also spent a wonderful day at the zoo on Sunday. Unfortunately they are working on the cats' exhibit and we didn't get to see the kids' favorites ~ lions & tigers. The weather was so gorgeous that all the other animals were out playing and/or sunning themselves.

I haven't decided yet which was the better purchase, membership to the zoo or the Children's Museum. J was extremely interested in getting both in 2007, and in beginning to do more things as a family. It's all obvious now, but regardless of the motives, it's been a great thing for our family. The kids have enjoyed both immensely and they're always asking to go back. There's not much that's better than knowing you can provide a good foundation for your kids and set a positive example. We are so fortunate that they're both growing up to be good citizens, environmentally conscious, forward-thinking (way too creative for their own good!) and respectful of themselves and others.

Have I said lately that life is good? It most certainly is!

Hunter's cheer squad won 2nd place on Saturday. Joel and Nicholas did all sorts of fun boy stuff around the house. They really get into working through that honey-do list! The house is looking great after all their work!!

Life is good. I know who I am and what I want. I have the love of friends and family. More importantly, I have their respect, and I deserve it. I'm proud of that fact and of the decisions I've made in my life that keep me deserving of their respect.

Today's Workout
25 minutes run/walk (while watching LSU kick some Buckeye butt!!)

My legs felt much better this evening, although I'm still the slowest thing around. For some unexplained reason, the kids were really difficult tonight. It might have been because Joel flew out to Cali to work again. I think they became accustomed to having him at home; I know I did. This, of course, is evidenced by my still sitting up blogging this instead of being curled up next to him sleeping blissfully. I don't sleep well when he's gone, which makes it more difficult to get up and workout. I suppose I need to get over that.

Aiming for yoga in the morning and then Sculpt 1/2 in the evening. Hunter starts her new night for gymnastics and I'll pick her up there so I can see the gym. She's been going with the cheer squad, but I want to check the place out, too. She seems to be learning a lot and she loves it, but I feel odd not having done any prior research on the gym. I do trust her cheer coach and she's got a daughter who's taking lessons there also, so I know she wouldn't knowingly put the kids in a potentially harmful position but still... it's my responsibility, ya know? It's not anyone else's and I couldn't forgive myself if something went wrong.

Have a great Tuesday, everyone!

judi

Friday's Workout:
Sculpt 1/2 (Power 90® workout)

Saturday's Workout:
45 minutes run/walk

Sunday's Workout:
Sculpt 1/2 (Power 90® workout)
30 minutes run/walk

Tonight's run was more like painfully lugging my lard butt through every step. It was next to impossible. I don't know if I hadn't recovered from yesterday's treadmill time yet or what, but I had a rough time getting moving beyond a walk at first. At any rate, I finished 30 minutes, some jogging but more walking than I'd planned.

Early day tomorrow, so off I go!

Today's Workout
Elliptical ~ 30 minutes
Sweat 1/2 (Power 90®)
Ab Ripper 100 (Power 90®)

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At lunch I went to the club and did another glute focused elliptical workout. Sheesh, but that really works ya! At home after dinner, I did the P90 workout, including the abs. Thank goodness dinner was relatively light or it would have been much tougher. As it was, I felt strong throughout the workout and finished feeling like I could have done more.

Today was day 8 of the 90 day Power 90® program. 82 more to go.

Today's Workout
Yoga ~ 60 minutes (a.m.)
Run/walk ~ 40 minutes

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I'm feeling better about working out again. I go back to work tomorrow, rather than today like I thought until viewing my crackberry at 6:00 a.m. and finding out I scheduled a day off! But back to my original train of thought ~ tomorrow will be the real test ~ can I continue to prioritize working out while trying to accommodate everyone else who jockeys for my time? Damn it, I better be able to do it. Other people do. It's not rocket science. It's not like I don't know what to do. And it's not like it isn't important.

On a totally unrelated topic, we had fun with the kiddos tonight. Nothing major other than watching them tickle each other and giggle uncontrollably for the longest time. They are so silly and so precious and we are so blessed!!

Today's Workout

Sculpt 1/2 (Power 90® workouts)
Run / walk ~ 30 minutes

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It's the first day of the New Year, and I suppose I should say something about resolutions, goals, and the like. Nothing too profound, of course, but here goes..

1) Seek joy in all that I do, or don't do it.
2) Practice consistency in my personal life. I'm consistent and reliable professionally, but I don't believe I've offered the same qualities in my personal life.
3) (and here's what we all expect to read!) ~ lose 40 lbs ~ 1 lb per week ~ before the big 4-0 gets here in October '08.

Back to work tomorrow. Hope it's a great day for everyone out there!

Today's Workout
7:00 a.m.
Sweat 1/2 (Power 90® workouts)
Ab Ripper 100 (Power 90® workouts)
Yoga ~ 60 minutes

9:30 p.m.
Run/walk ~ 3.05 miles, 38 minutes

Decent food choices. Great exercise today.
Happy New Year!

12/30 Workout

Sculpt 1/2 (Power 90® workouts)
Yoga for Weight Loss ~ 60 minutes

12/29 Workout

Sweat 1/2 & Ab Ripper 100 (Power 90® workouts)
Run/walk ~ 30 minutes

12/28 Workout

Sculpt 1/2 (Power 90® workouts)
Run/walk ~ 30 minutes
Elliptical ~ 30 minutes

12/27 Workout

Sweat 1/2 & Ab Ripper 100 (Power 90® workouts)
Run/walk ~ 30 minutes


Getting back into the swing of things and enjoying this Power 90® stuff a lot. Still lovin' the Nike + but got sidetracked by business commitments (again) and took too much time off from running or doing anything else that would get me back into shape. I am, once again, trying to maintain a proper work-life balance and prioritize my fitness for a change.

Today's Workout
30 minutes Core Rhythm Ab/Cardio workout
30 minutes treadmill
squats - 2 x 20
lunges - 2 x 10 (forward & back)
pushups - 3 x 10

ouch. ouch. ouch. Sunday my legs felt great after Saturday's run, with very little soreness. I woke up in the middle of the night, however, with serious DOMS. Wearing new shoes today (and getting the heel stuck in bad spot while crossing the street) combined with turning my ankle while searching for the breaker box outside made for the second half of my run being forfeited for a walk.

I did get the minutes in, but I was disappointed not to be able to run them all. Somewhere around 15 minutes, I started feeling this tweaking pain in the little bone (any thoughts on what it's called?) just to the outside of my ankle. Every step was painful, so I opted for the safer bet of walking. No pain when walking, but when I tried to begin running again, more pain. And that's why I finished with a long walk.

Tomorrow I'll take a break from running, and Wednesday, Sandra and I will hit the park at lunch. Wish me luck!

We had a very nice start to the weekend. I planned to take Hunter with me to Cullen Park and run while she rode her bike, but that would have meant leaving Joel and Nicholas home. It also would have meant trying to figure out a way to get Hunter's bike into the car (top down??), but Joel was the voice of reason and said there was no way in hell I was putting her bike in my car. :-)

Instead, we piled both kids & bike into the SUV and headed off for Mary Jo Peckham Park. My plan was to run for an hour and let Hunter ride as much of it as she could and then she could play on the kids' equipment with Nicholas. Well, what's that old saying about the best laid plans?? Something about them getting all screwed up?

To her credit, she was excited and really tried to ride with me. I don't run quickly (as is evident on the right of the screen), but two-thirds of the trail is dirt. It's great for running, but not so great for a kid's bike with training wheels. Compound walking backwards waiting for her to catch up with stopping and watching her run up a hill then back down and I finished with a 20 minute mile. Seriously. One mile. 20 minutes.

We packed the bike back into the car and just played for the rest of our time there. Then we stopped off at our favorite little hole-in-the-wall Mexican restaurant. As usual the food was better than average and the kids cleaned their plates.

So that means 1) I didn't run as far as I intended outdoors this a.m. and 2) I ate really yummy, really high fat Mexican food for brunch.

Alas, all was not lost! We made it home after picking up a new tire for Joel's bike and while Nicholas napped and Hunter played, I hopped on the treadmill for my 60 minutes. I did it! God, I was tasting brunch the whole time, but I ran barely over 5 miles in 60 minutes. Long, slow run, right? I think this qualifies as slow, and it's sure as hell longer than what I'd normally do.

Dinner was actually relatively healthy, and I haven't wanted to snack all day. In an attempt towards honesty, I should say that's because I pigged out on chips & salsa at brunch. Whatever.

I did try a new recipe for this smashed cauliflower thing at dinner. I need to add more seasonings, but overall it was decent.

Confetti Cauliflower
1 bag frozen cauliflower
1/2 bag frozen julienned peppers (red & green)
1/2 cup low-fat whipped cream cheese

Nuke the first two ingredients until warm, add the third and blend until smooth. (I had to nuke it more after blending because the cheese was cold, but it was an easy thing to do.) I topped it with some paprika, but it could have used more in the actual mix. It didn't suck, which is more than I can say for most other attempts I've made at making cauliflower edible.

I don't know if I want to run tomorrow or take a break. It's not like I need another break from running, since last week it was almost negligible. I read somewhere this week that if after a long slow run you feel the need for an all-afternoon nap, or that you can't get up your stairs, then you didn't run slowly enough. For that reason, I ran slower today. I felt noticeably better than I normally would after a weekend run, and that's what leads me to think I could run tomorrow with no negative affects.

OH!!!! I almost forgot ~ I got new running shoes !!! I didn't realize I needed them until I ran in them. Oh my gosh, I had forgotten what good cushioning felt like! The ones I got last year are here but last year's version. They were/are great, but apparently I've run more on them than I realized. I still like my Nike Free (first edition), but I've worn holes in the stretchy bit above the heels.

Clearly I'm on a roll talking to myself here... what next? I guess nothing. Happy & healthy running to all of you!

Today's Workout
60 minutes RT - PM

Talk about having reality smack you in the face.... I was just reading my old [and very limited] blog and had a posting there from exactly 2 years ago. I was thrilled to have reached a particular weight. I was thrilled to pass mirrors and not flip out over the 'fat chick in my clothes'. (yea, there was the whole bit about how some bigger girls are quite able to look pretty and well put together, but I'm not one of them, so I'm not hating on larger people, I swear ~ it just doesn't work for me.) And guess what that magic number was? Are you ready?

I'm not telling. What I will say is that it approximately 28 lbs below where I am these days. Unless my brain is fried and I can't do math today, but I don't think that's it. It better not be, as I just closed a multi-million dollar deal and there were calculations involved.

If I were speaking this outloud [to myself] there would be a string of expletives invoked here. Since I'm posting this for anyone and everyone to read, I'm not going there. Just know that I'm highly disgusted that instead of reaching my goal weight shortly thereafter, I'm now heavier than ever.

There's also a bit about the advice I'd give myself on my marriage, if I happened to be a friend of mine. How I cope [or don't] cope with the myriad of routine problems in my life has more to do with the number on the scale than anything else. I'm afraid that if I don't stop stuffing myself with food to avoid the real issues I'll just get bigger and bigger until I explode. I'm afraid that if I do stop stuffing myself with food to avoid the real issues, the emotions will come out and I'll explode. The bottom line is that I'm afraid.

So how do I get beyond this? How do I just suck it up and make it all work as best it can? For starters, I sign off, change into my workout clothes and meet Lisa downstairs for our workout.

The questions I pose aren't just rhetorical. I'm open to hearing/reading any suggestions that may be offered.

Today's Workout
20 minutes walk - PM
60 minutes RT - PM

Janet and I had another good workout with Lisa tonight. Lots of legwork, such as wall squats, one leg squats, deadlifts, leg lifts - from a side lying plank-ish position on the ball. As I said, LOTS of legwork! Back and calves, too, but I think my quads and hamstrings will feel it the most tomorrow.

And speaking of tomorrow, I've scheduled a treat for myself ~ a 90 minute massage. It's been ages since I've had one at all, and I've specifically requested someone who specialises in deep tissue, in order to work out some of the excess toxins (i.e., CAFFEINE) in my system.

Food stuff was good today, not perfect, but snacks were fresh fruit in the afternoon & a protein smoothie tonight after the workout. Lunch was a BIG salad, grilled chicken, and tomato bisque. I have no idea how the soup was made, but it was yummy and I needed that today. Surely it had to be better for me than the normal empty calories in baked lays, chocolate covered almonds, chips/salsa, or other such [yummy] crap.

More important than what I ate was that I felt in control of what I ate. I was more cognizant of whether I was really hungry or just wanting to munch (when that happened I grabbed 2 strawberries and a bunch of grapes from the fruit basket at work). That feels like an improvement.

Amy commented on yesterday's post that I should look at what fears are holding me back from making the right choices and living in the body I want. She's absolutely correct. I've been psychoanalysed to death and although I do know the whacked out reasons behind my rather irrational fears of being fit/thin/attractive again, there is something stopping me from making the consistent changes needed to reach my goals.

something.

it's probably just me.

On to more exciting topics... Hunter is cheering at her first pep rally tomorrow. I can't believe it. She's so worked up about it, and she's been practicing so hard. This is going to be so much fun!

Thanks to anyone and everyone who bothers to take the time to read this. Your comments are always welcome and appreciated.

Today's Workout
45 minutes tempo run (2 min. w/ 2 min. recovery) PM - 3.24 miles

Well, that didn't suck.

I'm still dreadfully slow, but that's okay. I am making progress and, while still slow, I'm faster than I imagined I could be this time last year. Huge improvements in endurance are evident also.

It's about freakin' time, folks. I guess the consistency thing really does pay off.

Speaking of consistency, Sandra has suggested that the two of us begin running at lunch twice a week. That means that instead of my evening run, I'll be getting in 30 minutes during the day. I might still be able to add a bit at night, but I don't want to overdo it. It will be nice to have someone to run with again, and Sandra is great company. It won't hurt that I'll actually be OUTDOORS running, which I desperately need practice in doing. I love my treadmill, but it's not the real thing, ya know?

In talking with another fitness/nutrition specialist (btw, I do still <3 Trainer Lisa but a girl's gotta tap all the resources she can!), he commented that this business about doing the right things to lose the weight and improve fitness (i.e., consistent yet varied cardio + resistance training + clean eating) is much like buying a new car. I know what the cost of fitness is. Do I want to pay that price in order to obtain the body I know I can have again?

Do I?

This has definitely triggered some new (and a resurgence of old) thoughts for me. I have some decisions to make and they're the same ones I've wrestled with making a million times over the past 4 years.

Either I accept myself at this size and this sub-par level of fitness and continue with the unhealthy eating and sporadic exercise, or I suck it up and make a change. If I don't do it now, I'll just have to revisit this decision later. Hell, even if I do it now, I'll still have to revisit it again and again in order to keep the motivation.

Yesterday's workout
45 minute tempo run

Today's workout
20 minute walk (AM)
60 minutes RT (PM)

I'm beat.

Looking forward to continuing the 3 day per week running ~ 1 tempo, 1 interval, 1 long slow run. Well, the long runs aren't so long right now, but they'll get there. I'm following the Half Marathon Training Schedule for Runners & Walkers by Jeff Galloway. There's no immediate plan to actually run a half-marathon, but I needed some sort of training plan to follow with a start and a finish. And who knows, maybe 13.1 will sound good again some day!?

I'm here.. still running.. still enjoying it.. but still fat.



blah

New haircut ~ yippee! (I could probably have used some makeup!)

Hunter @ her big brother's bday party!








Nicholas @ the party









Hunter, me & Donnie @ his party